My pastor friend Chris asked me to come to his church last Sunday and share “My Story…” with his congregation. God mercifully moved and ministered some profound healing to His hurting saints. There was also plenty of encouragement for the remnant who have endured great hardship and have survived to tell their own grace stories.
It was a wonderful time with some beautiful brothers and sisters, so I wanted to share the experience with you in this week’s podcast.
You’ll probably want to have 2 Corinthians 4 handy as you listen. I promise you, God will say something to you through these scriptures if you have ears to hear.
And, beloved, if your heart needs healing, this is for you.
TO: A young son in the faith FOR: Introduction to manhood* RE: My ’50-sense’ worth
Dear young man:
it is manly, healing and cleansing to cry
shake hands firmly while looking your counterpart in the eye
learn and remember names; the most beautiful sound a person hears is their own name being said back to them
write thank you notes for every good done to you, big or small; phone calls work also
hold doors for girls, and, oh heck, for everyone else why not?
never tell a girl “I love you” until you have clearance from the Lord she’s the one
seek the Lord’s counsel FIRST when you’re confused or doubtful on a matter; save others’ input until after you’ve sat a spell before Christ
live everyday so as to have a testimony of what the Lord has done for you/means to you
begin and end your day with prayers of thanks, even if you’re just breathing out a few words; ready thankfulness assures a revived heart daily
a young woman’s body is sacred; hands off; you must only view any female as Christ sees His bride
do something adventurous (outside your comfort zone) at least once a month; try something new regularly
take notes while you’re being given spiritual instruction; writing down the words is the quickest way to own them in your heart
keep a journal; if you only write a half a paragraph a day it’s worth it; write out a prayer once per week in your journal
stand out by taking care not to use foolish or vulgar words in your conversation; speak with integrity
may your word be trustworthy and honorable
if in doubt, don’t
learn to ask questions; it’s a sure-fire way to learn
choose your friends wisely; they must push you to grow in Christ; avoid unthankful, negative people; do not tolerate unkindness or arrogance
be an available friend, completely unselfish with your time and energy
show generosity to both God and your fellow man
volunteer regularly for ministries that bless the unfortunate
seek out a mentor (an older man) and let him walk out your faith with you (Dad, of course, but someone outside your family)
strive to learn something new from God’s Word every week
cultivate a desire to read; read a challenging book every six months (if not monthly)
return phone calls/texts promptly
be courteous to service staff in businesses and respectful to every adult
do not EVER harbor resentment or bitterness; get it dealt with quickly
be quick to say “I’m sorry” when you are at fault and never EVER tack a “but” onto the end of it
there’s no shame in trying; I say again: don’t be afraid to try new things; color outside the lines
you will fail, you will fall; expect at some point to be humiliated, but do not quit – it’s all part of learning the grace of maturity, so long as you don’t allow failures to define and/or hold you hostage
forgive QUICKLY when offended; do not make people have to jump through hoops for them to feel accepted with you once again
self-pride is an ugly wardrobe; think and act and respond in humility
share your faith with someone outside the faith every chance the Lord opens up a door of opportunity
read a classic at least once per year (your folks can help you identify some of the classics)
stand up for a weaker brother who needs defending, but turn the cheek when you are a victim (unless your life is in danger)
take a monthly sabbath alone with the Lord: a day, an overnight in the backyard, an afternoon; let it be a time for you to worship the Lord and renew your salvation
spend as much time in nature as you can
be on time; show up 5 minutes early to appointments
if employed, give reason for your boss to be impressed
eat well and healthy in your youth – you wouldn’t believe how it all catches up in your later years, and you want to be healthy for the Master until your days run out
pick up after yourself; don’t make someone have to remind you or, worse, go behind you cleaning up your messes
welcome suffering and hardship; praise God and trust His heart; there’s no holiness without hardship
don’t borrow your parent’s faith; lay claim to your own and live it passionately and with integrity
don’t try to be someone you’re not; find out WHO you are and know WHOSE you are and live out of that
treat young ladies with same respect you’d expect someone to treat your sister or your Mom
learn the basics of car maintenance
laugh five times a day
don’t use social media to post personal drama and don’t broadcast your entire life on FB and Instagram; leave some mystery and sacred space for your life
find something to like in everyone; don’t write anyone off – for ANY reason (doesn’t mean you have to be best friends, but show grace to everyone)
don’t waste your life; pursue Christ with every fiber, muscle and molecule of your being
That’s it. Proud of you, young man. Now, go have an amazing manhood!
For Christ and Kingdom, Pasture Scott
* A friend recently asked me (and others) to offer some sage counsel to his twin boys, turning 13. Dad was taking them on a ‘manhood’ outing and wanted other men of influence to speak life into them via the written word. I’ve retooled what I shared with his boys for this post.
I was privileged to pastor for 17 years and remain a pastor of sorts in the same community. I consider shepherding a local community of saints one of the greatest joys of my life, albeit one of the most difficult. Because it demands so much of one’s self I have told numerous minister wannabe’s to pursue it only if they cannot have passion for – or picture themselves doing – anything else.
Still, I could not invent a better “profession”! It is like air that I breathe, food that I consume, a crown that I wear (1 Thess 2:19)…and for all the best of reasons. I like the emphasis that Artie Davis places on this magnificent calling in the context of encouraging a son with ministry aspirations…
If my son were starting a church this weekend…
…and he came to me and asked, “Dad, what are the most important things I need to know?” I would think, “Man, this is my BOY! He has got to get this right.” I would pray a minute, ask him to take out his Ipad, and then say…
1-What you’re doing is all about loving people. Forget that, and you’re doomed
2-Make your wife priority! Never let her feel she’s in the back seat behind ministry
3-Raise your kids in freedom! Don’t let your position make you feel they have to be superstars
4-Learn to hear God’s voice. Know what His whisper sounds like… There is NO other way
5-It would be better to promote someone a year late, than a day early
6-Invest in those on your team. Let them see the good, bad and ugly
7-Never get in a rut! If you change 1-Degree at a time, you will maximize effectiveness
8-Preach from the overflow of what God is telling you
9-Don’t serve bread dough on Sunday morning, serve hot bread
10-Find a group of other leaders, form relationships… They will save your life!
11-Never seek to please people. That is a merry go round that never stops
12-You serve a Supernatural God, look for His movement, if you don’t look, you wont see
13-Hear God, follow Him, and leave the results to Him. “And the Lord added.”
14-Never forget to have fun! Serving God is hard, but you have to fun too!
15-Don’t ever try to be someone else. God put you there to be you…He likes you just as you are!
16-Strive to be a giver and not a taker! Always sow into others, rather than being the “Asker”
-Pastor Artie Davis, Cornerstone Comm Ch, Orangeburg, SC
Let me close out this post by including this quote from our friend, John Wesley. I think he hits the nail on the head when he advises the candidate (and seasoned vets) never to be after a ministry but, well, let’s go straight to the source:
“Don’t seek for a ministry, but seek for the fruit of a disciplined life.” John Wesley
