preaching to myself


[4 minutes, 710 words]

Do you talk to yourself? I do, and fairly often I might add. Don’t judge. I’ve heard it’s actually a pretty healthy activity that helps improve one’s cognitive function. It’s also an indicator that you’re a verbal processor, aiding in clarifying thoughts and solving problems. Self-talk does become problematic if one were to, say, carry on an entire conversation with one’s self — out loud, mind you — in the supermarket, on the public bus, or while waiting in line at the Chikfila.

Psalm 42 offers a classic example of why it’s so important to preach the gospel to ourselves when we are starting to go dark. One of Israel’s ordained worship leaders1 was shaken to his core.2 He had hard questions for God. He asks why He’s not coming through for him eleven different times. It’s an intensely personal psalm, packed with 50 personal pronouns.

In the middle of his pity party, this anonymous son of Korah recognizes how asinine his accusations against God have been and gives himself a good talking to.

Why, my soul, are you so dejected?
Why are you in such turmoil?
Put your hope in God,
for I will still praise him,
my Savior and my God.

And for good measure he chastises himself once again — using the very same words — at the end of his psalm3. Apparently, he’s a lot like you and me: we need to remind ourselves we aren’t God, we don’t know everything, and we aren’t always our own best counselors.

I pray this often: Lord, give me a love for Your Truth so that I will not be deceived. I don’t even want to deceive myself!

The Apostle Paul gravely warned the Corinthian believers:

Let no one deceive himself. If anyone among you thinks he is wise in this age, let him become a fool so that he can become wise.

1 Corinthians 3:18

When’s the last time you’ve had a sure enough come-to-Jesus meeting with yourself? Is it long overdue? Sitting and stewing and spewing out dark words without reprimand will harden you over time. If left unchecked, unbridled blame and bitterness will stain your soul.


“Have you realized that most of your unhappiness in life is due to the fact that you are listening to yourself instead of talking to yourself?”

— Martyn Lloyd-Jones, Spiritual Depression

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“Don’t just listen to your worries, preach to them.”

– Michael Reeves


The psalmist wearied of listening to the sound of his own voice. His vinegar words were like hot desert sand in his throat, drying up his reserves of inner peace and consolation.4 His onerous self-talk sounded like this:

God, don’t you care about me?5

Why should I trust you?

I’ve prayed and prayed until I’m blue in the face; you don’t listen. What good are my prayers?

I thought you were good. I guess not.


If you are entertaining these thoughts, it’s time to tear up that script and find another. If that kind of language is living in your heart, repent. Find a better sermon to preach to yourself.

Hey yo, I’m preaching to myself.

Every time I’ve said, “God, can’t you see what’s happening? Can’t you fix this?” (which is more often than I’m comfortable admitting), I’ve heard the Lord’s voice in my ear say, “What makes you think I don’t see? What makes you so sure I don’t have this?”


Why my soul are you so dejected? Why are you in such turmoil? Put your hope in God! C’mon, Scott, you know better!


I’m such a dunderhead sometimes. In those wildly unattractive moments, I need to stop listening to myself and start talking to myself. I need a long-winded, Spirit-led, grace-filled, life-changing sermon to get me to the altar.

Join me in this new year, won’t you, and may we reform our ways; let’s stop listening to our thoughts and emotions and begin preaching a better gospel to ourselves.

As such, we should take a page from the psalmist’s playbook:

  • Put your hope in God6
  • Praise Him in all things
  • Remember all the many other times He’s come through for you7
  • Never question how much He loves you…unfailingly so8
  • Trust in God’s round-the-clock protection9

Selah, beloved.


  1. The signature for this psalm is given as a “son of Korah.” Such were entrusted with the organization and implementation of temple worship ↩︎
  2. “turmoil,” v5, pictures a loud moaning that can erupt into a scream; Jeremiah uses it in Jer. 4:19 to describe his anguished heart beating loudly inside him ↩︎
  3. Psalm 42:11 ↩︎
  4. Psalm 42:1-3 ↩︎
  5. Psalm 42:9 ↩︎
  6. Psalm 42:5, 11 ↩︎
  7. Psalm 42:6 ↩︎
  8. Psalm 42:7 ↩︎
  9. Psalm 42:8 ↩︎

quiverfull

NOTE (6/5/23): In lieu of a certain documentary recently released regarding Bill Gothard and the IBLP’s various teachings — such as ‘quiverfull’ — I feel compelled to add this post is in no way influenced by his teachings!

I was reading an ‘anti-abortion’ scripture passage, when the Holy Spirit jostled my heart. A sudden parting of a curtain allowed me a peek inside a gospel mystery. In a quick instant my spiritual astigmatism vanished and I understood why God won’t march with the pro-abortion crowd.

Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD,
the fruit of the womb a reward.

Like arrows in the hand of a warrior
are the children of one’s youth.

Blessed is the man
who fills his quiver with them!

Psalm 127:3-5, ESV

If children are a gift from God, why stop at one? Why choose abortion? If you are able, have as many as you can! Double, triple, quadruple your gladness.

I mentioned the Holy Spirit entering the moment. His heart revealed the great gospel mystery in this. If children are among an earthly parent’s greatest pleasures, doesn’t it also say something about our Father and his heavenly family?

God, too, wants a “quiverfull” of kids! He wants his house teeming with children! Our Heavenly Father is a great big softie when it comes to parenthood. He just keeps adopting and adopting…and adopting…

He’s never birthed a mistake. Not one of his has ever been an inconvenience to him.

That’s all well and good, you say, but what do we make of this scripture?

Jesus traveled through cities and villages, teaching and making his way to Jerusalem. Someone said to him, “Lord, will only a few be saved?”

Luke 13:23, Common English Bible

We might expect Jesus to say something like, “Are you crazy? A few? Hardly a few, my good man.”

That’s not what he says, though.

Make every effort to enter through the narrow gate. Many, I tell you, will try to enter and won’t be able to.

Luke 13:24, CEB

So which is it? Does God want his house to be filled or does he want to limit who gets in? Well, based on Jesus’s teaching, both are true.

I’ve studied and puzzled and even lamented over this teaching for a long time. My conclusion is that there are many who believe in themselves — or religion — for their salvation.

By contrast only a comparatively few who, by submitting to the demands of justification — repentance and faith — can live with absolute, peace-filled assurance they are already and forevermore living in his house. That’s the difference between being in God’s family and eternal self-abortion.

Don’t forget the primary audience are Jews who are heavily influenced by their religion of works-righteousness. Consequently, they will be turned away at the door because they refused the gate (Jesus).

As for the “few who will be saved?” I’m looking at you Nicodemus. I’m also looking at you, Joseph of Arimathea. And you, Brothers James and Jude.

Don’t you know it took a lot of effort on their part to remain true to Jesus in spite of their affiliation with the sect of the Pharisees or as reluctant skeptics? Still, the Bible appears to give evidence to their true faith. They’re in God’s quiver.

There’s another guy in the Bible who testified that he made the grade among the religious folk, but had he not turned miraculously to Jesus, he would never have made the cut. I speak, of course, of Saul of Tarsus.

Do we really need to be reminded of the great effort Paul had to endure to be a follower of Jesus? He’s for sure in God’s great gospel quiver.

The eternal kingdom will look nothing like an old west Montanan territory with only a sprinkling of settlers spread out for miles and miles. Heavens, no. Our forever family will be a great big loud bunch of crazy shouting, dancing, and running kids. God wants it that way; he wants his house bulging at the seams.

I’ve shared a terrifying dream I had about Graham with some of you. About two or three nights after he passed away, I had a nightmare of him burning in hell. It was quite vivid; I could even hear him screaming from the abyss.

Then I remembered, or, more accurately, God reminded me he doesn’t inspire nightmares to provoke us to fear, the devil does. The accuser wanted me to think my son is lost forever.

The devil is a liar. While he wants our children dead, God is very pro-life. It’s not a political talking point to him, it is genuine. The Heavenly Father delights in bringing many sons and daughters into glory.

The devil wants you thinking you can do life on your own terms; God wants you to stop running.

The devil wants you falling from grace; God wants you falling into his arms.

The devil wants you to be a rebel; God wants you to know his rest.

The devil loves abortion; God is all about the quiverfull.

two words that shape my faith

I’m not a Muslim because of two words. I have friends who follow the teachings of Mohammed regarding Allah, and I love them, but could never take their path.

These two words safeguard me from turning to agnosticism or atheism. I can’t fall away from the faith because of the way these two words are put together. I can admire some of the kinder gentler tenets and proverbs of various eastern religions but would rue the day before entrusting my eternal destiny to them.

Here they are, in all their glory. Sit before them and be amazed:

Jesus wept.

Call me an old softie, but I quite like a deity who feels what I feel. Isaiah promised a Messiah who “suffers when we suffer” (Isa 63:9). Paul didn’t say God merely pities us, he said the Father spills over with mercy and embraces us with smothering comfort (2 Cor 1:3).


Jesus is no remote deity, watching suffering from a safe distance. He is the God who inhabits our suffering.

– Rebecca McLaughlin


John, specifically, zeros in on the “I AM” episodes of Jesus in his gospel. When you see “I AM” in scripture your mind probably goes to burning bushes and almightiness, shoes-off zone, time’s-up for oppressive regimes, and the like. You envision an all-caps “LORD” not the lower case kind.

John’s gospel shows us the I AM-ness of the Almighty also allows space for himself to weep. Anger from deity we get, but sorrow? Tears?

Jesus is called “Man of Sorrows” in Isaiah and our Lord is not the least bit embarrassed by that designation. The powerful “I AM” is moved to tears and that moves me. As the Holy Spirit moved John along to pen the words to his gospel, he let the aged apostle know he wanted this most vulnerable part of Christ’s earthly ministry published for all the see.

“Jesus wept.”

First he snorted like a Roman warhorse, then he sniffled and sobbed. A lot of folk prefer their Messiah to be all thunder and lightning and calling down of fire. Others can only stomach a gentle and lowly Savior.

With Jesus you get both, but mostly the Jesus you get in the gospels is the One who enters into our pain.

There are two times in the gospels we find Jesus weeping. Here, and in Luke.

Jesus doesn’t just “feel your pain.” He also hates it. He hates what it does to you. He sees the long game, that every eye will be dried one day and there will be no more pain, but he also meets us in our most painful moments with mercy and justice in the here and now.

In “The Lion King” when Simba returns after a long time away and sees what Scar has done to the kingdom, plunging it into death and despair, there is an alarming look of righteous anger that clouds his countenance.

That’s what’s going on just before the dam inside Jesus of Nazareth breaks.

Weeping Jesus sees the enemy of this world wreaking havoc on his creation, disturbing the order. The same emotion Jesus felt when he saw the court of the Gentiles being barred and barricaded by hucksters, charlatans and snake oil salesmen, preventing the people from gathering to worship, is the emotion of this anger he felt outside Bethany. If he had had a whip in his hands he would’ve been swinging it at the enemy.

I’ll follow a God like that anywhere and all the way into eternity.

Selah, beloved.