Coming to an operating room near you?

House reps moonlighting as healthcare professionals, maybe?

Scary.

10 Things You’d Rather Not Hear During Surgery:

  • “Better save that. We’ll need that for the autopsy.”
  • “Wait a minute! If this is the spleen, then what’s that?”
  • “Oops…hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?”
  • “Ya know…there’s big money in kidneys these days and this guy’s got TWO of ‘em…”
  • “Could you stop that thing from thumping? It’s throwing my concentration off.”
  • “I hate it when stuff is missing.”
  • “That’s cool! Now, can you make his leg twitch?”
  • “Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us.”
  • “The patient’s already had some kids–right?”
  • “Accept this sacrifice, O great lord of darkness!”

 

Exactly who was it who said, “The nine most terrifying words in the English language are: ‘I’m from the government, and I’m here to help.’”?

Perhaps if they took their scalpels to that thousand page bill…

Now there’s an idea!

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